Mightier Than The Pen

Making The World A Bitter Place

40 Free Additional Decibels for the First 10,000 to Complain about Noise!

with 2 comments

You Are Cordially Invited

To an Outdoor Gala Concert Event

In Honor of the Run-of-the-Mill City Resident

Who Did Not Desire, Let Alone Request

this Imposition on His Precious Time, Space and Quiet.

To Take Place on Sunday, 16 October, from 6 PM to 12 AM – Bedtime for the Children – in the Public Park Abutting a Central Residential Neighborhood.

Honored Guest Performers to Include D-List Celebrities with a Vague Ethnic Connection to the Community the City Seeks to Salute, and whose Agents Have Relatives or Old Friends in the Municipal Bureaucracy.

 Paid Parking Available in Municipal Lots Adjacent the Park, or on the Streets Normally Reserved for Residents Only, but for Purposes of this Event, Municipal Parking Inspectors Will Turn a Blind Eye to Violators of this City Ordinance, with the Bizarre Rationalization that the Anticipated Boost in Tourism Somehow Justifies the Added Hassle for the Resident Forced to Haul Sleeping Children Two Blocks from the Car to Their Home, and whose Taxes Are Funding this Whole Enterprise.

Special Setup and Sound Check Noise Pollution Available for up to Ten Hours Preceding the Concert.

For More Information, Call Our Events Hotline at 1-800-EAT-SH*T

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Written by Thag

October 16, 2011 at 9:31 pm

2 Responses

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  1. I’ve already been to three of these events this weekend. Thanks, but I think I’ll pass… 😉

    Lorna's Voice

    October 16, 2011 at 10:56 pm

    • Oh, so YOU’RE the one who keeps taking my parking spot.

      Thag

      October 17, 2011 at 6:34 am


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