Mightier Than The Pen

Making The World A Bitter Place

Should Have Read the Actual Rental Contract

with one comment

RENTAL AGREEMENT
between
________________________, lessor
and
________________________, lessee
signed on _____________
for the property at ____________________________________________________________

1. Lessor and lessee must figure out which of the  terms refers to whom before proceeding with any of this.

2. Once the respective identities of the lessor and lessee are understood by both parties, they may enter into awkward negotiations.

3. If lessor and lessee are friends, the lessor must be the one to broach the subject of payment terms.

4. The monthly rent shall be $ ______, payable in cash, check, PayPal transfer, babysitting hours, child care hours, or janitorial hours with emphasis on dish washing.

5. Lessor guarantees that his children will not be actively encouraged to invade the room provided to the lessee.

6. Lessee absolved lessor of liability for damage to lessee property as a result of children nevertheless barging into the room and manhandling everything in sight.

7. Lessor will ensure availability of toilet paper, soap and towels in sufficient quantities.

8. Lessee will keep toilet paper and soap the hell out of the reach of lessor’s children.

9. Lessee is welcome at any family meals at no additional charge, provided sufficient advance notice is given.

10. Lessee will find adequate solutions to the problem of different children insisting on sitting next to lessee during said meals.

11. This agreement may be terminated by lessor with one months’ notice, or by the lessee upon witnessing the havoc wrought by children of the lessor, havoc that could be neither anticipated, as they seemed like such angels, nor prevented, as who would think a seven-year-old could pick a lock?

Signatures:  Lessor ________________________  Date _______________

Lessee _________________________ Date ____________________

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Written by Thag

September 14, 2011 at 9:27 pm

One Response

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  1. Great job! Love #1. Goshdarn legal mumbo jumbo.

    whatimeant2say

    September 17, 2011 at 10:15 pm


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