Mightier Than The Pen

Making The World A Bitter Place

My Love for You Is More Beautiful than an Oozing Sore

with 2 comments

Although you may fervently wish for love at first sight to exist, love does not spontaneously combust; like the fungus between your toes, it must be given the proper environment, then nurtured. Only then may it blossom, and send out its infectious spores.

Too many of us, it seems, want to believe the fantasies, that people can experience lasting attraction within the first seconds of meeting. Attraction, yes; love, not so. The lust that rears its head in those initial moments may persist, like that large pimple on your forehead, and you might even seek to renew it with the greasy food of new thrills. Alas, just as the connection between acne and greasy food only exists in the realm of myth, so too does a lasting connection based solely on physical attraction.

How, then, to establish the right environment for love, the medium of congealed sheep’s blood, if you will? Engage the mind, not merely the body; look for a mate whose values match yours, much in the way HIV attacks only certain white blood cells. Ensure that when the pathogens of romance begin colonizing the petri dish of your emotions, they have plenty of agar and nutrients upon which to feed. Then let the eukaryotic germs of true love spread themselves throughout your system.

But even the most self-aware couples can fall into a rut of humdrum relationships, when they find themselves too busy to nurture the festering froth of pathogenic love. That only underscores the importance of setting aside chunks of the fermenting sourdough starter of shared living, to allow the fungal growth of emotional intimacy to take place.

Nevertheless, a couple cannot become complacent, and allow the candida infesting the intimate zones of their lives to wither and perish, for a relationship is a delicate thing, constantly under peril of attack from the antifungal creams of jealousy, power games and roving eyes and hands. When, even unwittingly, a lover chooses to continue reading a book when the other needs some company, that slathers antibacterial ointment on the open pustules of true closeness, rendering any meaningful connection in subsequent moments, days and weeks more difficult than getting the Simian Immunodeficiency Virus to bind to human cells.

But armed with the knowledge that the biochemical threats to the metastasizing tumors of love are constantly trying to gain access to our emotional bloodstream, we as couples can remain vigilant in our efforts to keep the invasive cells and spores of pestilence and plague in our systems.


Written by Thag

May 23, 2011 at 3:37 pm

2 Responses

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  1. Thanks for broadening my vocabulary. I had to look up “eukaryotic.” I was surprised to discover it had nothing to do with singing along.

    David Shaffer

    May 23, 2011 at 4:30 pm

    • You mean you’ve never heard Strychnine’s sonata for nausea and colitis in ailments major and minor?


      May 23, 2011 at 6:22 pm

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