Mightier Than The Pen

Making The World A Bitter Place

You Cleaned Your Room?! That’s It, Buster, No Dessert!

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I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.

I was just playing around down here, probably using the action figures and stuffed toys in some make-believe scenario, and it occurred to me to start putting everything away. I can’t really explain it; I know this behavior is just not like me at all, let alone like other six-year-olds.

So I apologize for shocking you so, and for sowing confusion among other children and parents. I really don’t know what to say or how to go about rectifying this mess – well, it’s no longer a mess, obviously, but that’s precisely the difficulty.

Maybe it will help to go through it step by step; perhaps then we might arrive at some indication of what lies behind this madness. As I said, there I was, playing in the middle of the room with various toys, and I got the sudden urge to clean the whole room by myself, without telling anyone. Where that thought came from, I have no idea; I just know I started the way we always start, by lining up the stuffed animals at the back of the couch, but this time, without a grown-up standing over me. It was definitely a curious feeling, putting things away without being asked or told to do so, but perhaps the novelty of it is what kept me going.

I continued by taking apart the train tracks and putting all the pieces in the bin. In retrospect, I’m surprised I knew where the bin was, let alone how to fit everything in properly. In any case, that left a bit more room to start collecting the scattered Lincoln Logs, Tinker Toys and alphabet blocks, and to put them in their respective bins. I even made sure that the stackable bins were sitting securely on top of one another before proceeding – so I know as well as you do that this was not a normal turn of events. I can even recall the perverse sense of satisfaction I got every time a block, log or Tinker Toy clunked into its bin. That was beyond weird.

As for my sister’s Barbies, I actually took the time to put the outfits on them instead of chucking everything into one spot – and the way I arranged the dolls and accessories in an almost-reasonable setup testifies to there being something seriously wrong going on. I even looked under the couch for missing pieces and put them in place! Even those perpetually disappearing shoes that never fit the dolls right! If that isn’t a cry for help, I don’t know what is!

So please, beyond accepting my abject apology, please help me. I never want this to happen again. What can we do?


Written by Thag

March 3, 2011 at 9:33 am

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