OK, We Get It. You Like to Drop Things. Cut It Out Already.
The Scene: It is Saturday morning. Thag and Miggtha remain in bed as their children scurry about the house.
Miggtha: Shouldn’t we get up?
Thag: Of course we should. That doesn’t mean we will.
Miggtha: What was that noise?
Thag: The plunk? Probably something getting thrown downstairs. A piece of Kid K’nex, I think.
Migghta: Are you sure? It sounded more like a Matchbox-type car.
Thag: No, that wouldn’t have sounded so much like plastic. The little cars aren’t one solid piece, so you can hear the vibrating of the wheels or whatever. It’s just a different quality of sound.
Miggtha: And that one?
Thag: LEGO. You can tell by the telltale secondary tinkling sounds. The little guy must have dropped an assembled structure down there, not just individual blocks. Wonder why the other kids don’t seem to mind that he’s ruining it?
Migghta: Okay, that one was definitely not LEGO. It sounded like wood.
Thag: I dunno. I thought all the wooden blocks were already downstairs.
Miggtha: Must be the Jenga. You hear the way all the pieces sound the same as they bounce?
Thag: Yeah, you’re probably righ – what was that?!
Migghta: Sounds like something hit the garbage can downstairs. Stuffed animal?
Thag: Maybe, but that was pretty loud for a plush bear. And it wasn’t a Tinker Toy.
Miggtha: No, that was a Tinker Toy. Or a handful of them.
Thag: I’m glad we’ve learned to distinguish between Tinker Toys and LEGO blocks.
Migghta: Oooh. If I hear right, I think he’s managed to squeeze a whole bag of marbles through the railing.
Thag: Are you sure it’s marbles? Could be Ralph’s pebble collection. Oh, Lord. Not again.
Miggtha: Wonderful. If I had to guess, I’d say we’re down another sippy cup. Literally.
Thag: Oh, brother. What’s it now, three in the space of four weeks?
Migghta: Something like that. So, are you gonna get out of bed and stop the madness, or let him keep finding things to toss down until there’s nothing left up here but the furniture?
Thag: What, you don’t find this guessing game entertaining?
Miggtha: It’s a blast. But you’re cleaning up afterwards. I told you to get out of bed.
Thag: No you didn’t. You asked me if I was going to do something about it. I said no. Why should I be the one?
Migghta: Because I said so. Now go stop him from throwing more things down, and see whether you can see a puddle from up here. If not, you can come back to bed.
Thag: Thank you so much.